“Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish on its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”
-Albert Einstein.

Hoy sobre la tierra pongo mi rostro y te escucho, te escucho, sangre, música, panal agonizante. No he visto deslumbradora raza como la tuya, ni raíces tan duras, ni manos de soldado, ni he visto nada vivo como tu corazón..

No estoy solo desde que has muerto. Estoy con los que te buscan. Estoy con los que un día llegarán a vengarte. Que sepan los que te mataron que pagarán con sangre. Que sepan los que te dieron tormento que me verán un día.

Que sepan los malditos que hoy incluyen tu nombre en sus libros, los Dámasos, los Gerardos, los hijos de perra, silenciosos cómplices del verdugo,que no será borrado tu martirio, y tu muerte caerá sobre toda su luna de cobardes.

Déjame darles yo el desdeñoso olvido porque a mí me quisieron mutilar con tu ausencia. No te olvido...Pero aprendí la vida con tu muerte: mis ojos se velaron apenas, y encontré en mí no el llanto, sino las armas inexorables!

- Pablo Neruda. 

♥

Un señor muy poderoso, dice que es una vergüenza, un insulto a la decencia, un oficio indecoroso. Le erró de pies a cabeza, porque vergüenza es robar, vergüenza no es trabajar, llevar el pan a la mesa.

And the head said that you always were a queer one from the start. For careers you say you want to be remembered for your art. Your obsessions get you known throughout the school for being strange -

Nobody said it was easy, no one ever said it would be this hard.

(but it is)

En mi país que tristeza, la pobreza y el rencor.

Creo que con una canción la tristeza es más hermosa.

Creo que con una palabra puedo decir mil cosas.
Creo que es mejor morir de pie que vivir de rodillas.

Creo que el viento me alcanzó el olor de tu mejilla.
Creo en el sol si me cura las heridas.

Creo en tu voz.

Creo en la vida, en la noche, en tu alma, y no creo en todo lo demás.
Creo en tu sonrisa, creo en mí si te veo hoy y me pedís que no me rinda. Sigo por vos.
Creo en la lluvia cuando cambia el olor de mi tierra. Creo en el mar cuando amanece abrazándose a las piedras.

Creo en los jazmines que un dios me bajo una vez para poder conocerte .

Appreciate what you have

-Godofredo me contó algo muy feo de tí Zezé. ¿Es verdad?
Moví la cabeza afirmativamente.
-¿De la flor? Sí, es cierto señorita.
-¿Cómo lo haces?
-Me levanto temprano y paso por el jardín de la casa de Sergio. Cuando el portón está apenas entornado, entro rápido y robo una flor. Hay tantas que no hacen falta...
-Sí, pero no está bien. No debes volver a hacer eso nunca más. No es un robo, pero es un hurto.
-No lo es señorita. ¿Acaso el mundo no es de Dios? ¿Y todo lo que hay en el mundo no es de Dios acaso? Entonces también las flores son de Él.
Quedó espantada con mi lógica.
-Únicamente así podría traerle una flor señorita. En casa no hay jardín. Una flor cuesta dinero...Y yo no quería que su escritorio fuese siempre el único con el florero vacío.
Ella tragó en seco.
-¿Acaso de vez en cuando usted no me regala un dinerito para comprarme una galleta rellena?
-Te lo daría todos los días pero desapareces...
-No podría aceptar ese dinero todos los días..
-¿Por qué?
-Porque hay otros niños pobres que tampoco traen merienda.
Sacó el pañuelo de la cartera y se lo pasó disumuladamente por los ojos.
-Señorita, usted no ve a ''Lechuzita''?
-¿Quién es?
-Esa negrita de mi tamaño, ésa a la que la madre le sujeta el cabello en rulitos, y se los ata con un piolín.
-Ya sé, Dorotília.
-Ella misma señorita. Dorotília es aún más pobre que yo. Y las otras chicas no quieren jugar con ella porque es negrita y muy pobre. Por eso ella se queda siempre en un rincón. Yo divido con ella mi galletita, esa que usted me regala.
Entonces se quedó con el pañuelo en la nariz durante mucho tiempo.
-De vez en cuando usted podria darle ese dinero a ella en vez de dármelo a mí. La mamá lava ropa y tiene 11 hijos. Todos chiquitos todavía. Dindinha, mi abuela, todos los sábados le da un poco de feijao y de arroz para ayudarlos. Y yo divido mi masita con ella porque mi mamá me enseñó que uno debe dividir la pobreza propia con quien todavía es más pobre.

Y que la lluvia me moje y secarme con el sol.
Llevar mi mente muy lejos, donde nadie estuvo.
Me gusta tener tu risa y tu mirada también. Si los demás tienen prisa, dejemos todo y a empezar otra vez. Adónde vamos? corazón donde vamos? ,corazón de cristal. Me gusta el campo a la noche para salir a fumar. Que soy feliz con muy poco, un árbol y una mujer, un cielo grande, mil estrellas ellas nunca me van a dejar caer.

I'm the hero of the story, don't need to be saved.
It's alright. No one's got it all

from le love

After a horrifying break up, i sent myself into isolation. Away from friends, away from family, away from anyone or anything that breathes. One day, i decided to buy myself a holiday. A long long holiday of 2 weeks. and i chose Bali, Indonesia as my destination. While packing my bags, i checked if i had everything i needed.... Passport? Check cash? Check Surfboard? Check Hmm, looks like thats all i'll need when i'm away. my brothers sent me off to the airport that day. God knows i love them to bits as they have been the ones taking care of me since mum and dad moved to japan when dad got transfered. The flight took 7 hours, but i didn't care. I needed time alone. Actually, i wanted time alone. I reached bali with a somewhat happy heart. No one i knew was there, no one to bother me..life was good..for that few minutes. Then i heard my name being called. I turned around to look, and oh my goodness, my heart stopped beating. It was tino! My childhood neighbour! He came over, we talked and found out that we were staying at the same hotel. Since i had airport transfer all booked, i told him to jump in with me. He saw my surfboard, i saw his surfboard and yelled 'yay!!!!!' Tino and i have been friends since we were 4. I've lived in so many countries over the past 27 years of my life, that i've got friends everywhere. But tino was special. even when i was a kid, i'd tell my parents that i'm gonna marry tino when i grow up. He told his parents the same. So imagine how my heart skipped so many beats when i saw him! if i remember correctly, i last met him at the airport, was when we were moving away. we were 10 back then. I cried and hugged him so tightly and told him i was going to miss him, but not to worry, i'll come back to visit. He cried and said its like he's losing his best friend. Deep inside me, i felt the same. As we reached the hotel, we found out that we were in rooms right next to each other. I asked if he was rooming with someone..he said 'nah. I'm here alone bubba'.. I said 'hehe, same here' We went to our rooms to unpack and my room phone rings.. 'bubba..lets go surfing!'... It was tino. I replied 'ok. Come over in 10'.. I put on my bikini top, shorts, and my wetsuit on top. 10 on the dot my doorbell rings and there stood tino with his board shorts and surf board. I laughed and said ' you're freaking pasty tintin'..he told me to shut up and get moving and gave me a hug when i was near enough. We surfed, laughed and then got hungry so we walked on to the hotel cafe to have a bite. The owner of the cafe walks in and asks if we were a couple. I kept quiet and smiled. Tino said 'yes. We've been together since we were 4!'. I looked up at the cafe owner and swore his eyes were going to pop out of their sockets. He said 'since the both of you were 4??'... We answered 'yes!!!' together. Time spent with tino was fun, emotional and somewhat familiar. It was like going back to my childhood where nothing mattered, no worries, and the main goal of the day, was to have fun. One night, over dinner, tino asked me, 'bubba, why didn't you come back?'... I replied ' i did. But you weren't there. You were with amii.' tino looked at me and said ' you knew?' Of course i knew, jules, arly, raizz and tay-o were keeping me informed..too well informed..they wrote to me every week. No matter where i was. But tino didn't. I didn't receive one, not one letter from him since we moved. I told him 'we share the same friends tintin. They wrote to me. But not you.' He sat there. Tears started forming in his eyes. He looked at me, and a tear fell. 'i didn't know what to write bubba... I didn't know how to start... everytime i tried, i failed. Everytime i tried, i ended up crying. I felt so alone when you were gone.. I sat on your porch every evening hoping that i would hear you, or see you run up the driveway...but that didn't happen.. I felt so lost.. It was like a part of me died..my best friend was in another country.. I died the day you left bubba..i died.' I answered with a simple 'we're here together now aren't we? In a different country..at the same time..' It's like we were still connected even though we were so far apart. i didn't know how else to explain how we both managed to book flights for 2 weeks to the same destination, same hotel, and how the of us just decided to bring along our surfboards. After that night, he said he didn't want to be apart anymore. He proposed. I accepted. We called up our families to tell them and my dad's reaction, was priceless. 'bubba? How in the world did tino propose to you? You're all the way in bali aren't you? I replied 'emm.. Dad, he's right here with me. I saw him after i got off the plane.' My brothers were estatic. They couldn't believe that what i told them when i was 4, was actually happening. Even though we were engaged, we had to go back to our countries to get stuff done before we could be together for life. After 3 months of him flying to be with me, and me flying to be with him, i found out i was pregnant. We were excited! Not only were we going to be together forever, but now, we would have a family! And after a few months of doctor's visits, we found out we were having a boy... We planned to have our ceremony right after our son was born to make it an more joyous occasion. Tino was already planning what he was going to teach our son..they would go fishing, hiking, do 'manly' stuff..then out of the blue, tino said 'i bought us a house. It isnt grand or anything but it has a garden up front, and at the back, we have the beach'.. I was stunned and the house he purchased sounded so familiar. He bought the house where i once lived. I was in my 36th week of pregnancy and so far, it had been an easy one. No morning sickness..no aches or pains..nothing.. We had an argument that night, and tino headed off somewhere. He headed off to be with some so called friends that we both knew were nothing but trouble. I couldn't sleep that night. I had a nang feeling that tino was in trouble. 8 minutes after midnight, i get a call from ananda saying that tino was in an accident. He rammed into a tree. The car was a total loss. He was drunk driving. I rushed to the hospital but when i got there, it was already too late. My tintin....was gone. I was sad, heartbroken but mostly mad at him for doing something so stupid. Then i had pains. I was in labour. The day my tintin died, our riley came into the world. a happy bouncing baby boy. Perfect in every way possible. now, when riley asks me 'mum, where's my dad?' My eyes fill with tears and tell him.. 'dad's watching over you. In fact, i think he's right next to you. If you close your eyes and listen, he might be telling you stuff my dear boy' Riley closed his eyes, and listened. he then walked up to me, smiled, gave me a hug and said ' dad says he loves you and that he's so sorry for being stupid. He says he'll never leave you and that he'll always be with us. Always always.' When riley said always always, i knew tino was talking to him. Only tino and i ever say always always because saying it twice, means forever. Now, everytime i miss tino, i just have to look at our son. Riley Sky Marriott-Beth.
oh my god, life's so unfair.

She lives in a fairy tale, somewhere too far for us to find. Forgotten the taste and smell off the world that she's left behind. It's all about the exposure the lens I told her,the angles were all wrong now. She's ripping wings off of butterflies with her feet on the ground.
And her head in the clouds♥, well go get your shovel, and we'll dig a deep hole to bury the castle, bury the castle.

Her prince finally came to save her, and the rest you can figure out.

We'll make sure to build your house brick by boring brick, or the wolves gonna blow it down.
Well you built up a world of magic, because your real life is tragic.

You can see it with your eyes, even in the dark and that's where I want to be.

-
Love, Lucy♥